As I wrote yesterday, I picked up this book in hopes of understanding – and desiring to be a cool aunt to them as well as my nieces – my nephews.

Wow, I learned so much about men from reading this book. It was like peering inside a man’s head and being able to read their minds, all of a sudden. Or at least sort of, enough to get by.

I immediately bought copies for the mothers I knew well enough. (I don’t think they all read it.)

One of my best friends from high school¹ told me once that girls are harder emotionally (daughter crying because little girls are mean) and little boys are harder physically – because they hurl themselves off things and break their bones.²

This book explains why.

This is the book that persuaded me that high school should start later in the day. And explained by teenaged boys stink so much, even before the Axe.

A neuropsychiatrist and neurobiologist, the author looks at the hormonal surges that flood through male bodies throughout their lives, and links that back to their behaviors – behaviors that perhaps even they don’t understand.

Here’s an example:

The teen male […] begins to perceive voices and other sounds differently than he did before adolescence. And his changing hormones can make hiim hear things differently than girls his age. […] researchers found that during puberty, estrogen surges in females and testosterone surges in males increase the hearing differences between girls’ and boys’ brains, but the main difference is that some simple sounds, like white noise, are processed differently in the male brain. [Researchers] compared the brain activity of […] males and females as they processed the sound of white noise and […] the sound of music. […] The male brains […] activated to the music, but they deactivated to the white noise. It was as if they didn’t even hear it. The screening system in their male brains was automatically turning off the white noise.³

Likewise, when Zoe and her friends talked endlessly about movies, fashion, and other girls, their combined voices just sounded like humming and buzzing to Jake’s ears. For him and the other guys, following the girls’ rapid musical banter was practically impossible. The best they could do was nod their heads and pretend to be listening.

If you are lucky enough to be a parent of boys – or a teacher of boys – or just want to figure out why you (if you are a woman) – or the man in your life (if you are a woman) – do what you do, give this a try.

Easy to read, totally enjoyable. Give it a shot.

1. Who shall remain nameless on the very slim chance that her children read this. ↩︎
2. Little did she realize – her son was on the cutting edge of the generation of boys who are such delicate flowers that they can’t go to college or get a job and shelter in basement, complaining that no one understands them. Her son is actually not like that but the boys after him… Hm. I blame the hormones in the meat and dairy. Perhaps if their mothers had raised them as vegans, they’d have more fortitude. ↩︎
3. Ellipses mine, where I cut stuff out for length. ↩︎