The other morning I got up at 5 a.m., a habit I have been trying to recreate. It allows me a few minutes to blog before my husband, deceived by the empty spot in my bed to think it’s time for him to get up, and cranky when he realizes how early it really is, oh how the worm has turned! Where was I? Oh, it allows me a few minutes to blog before leaving for 6 a.m. yoga or in this case, since it was a Sunday, 8 a.m. yoga.
Anyhow, I arose with the intention of blogging then yoga, then a nice long walk wrapped up by grocery shopping. When it came time to go to yoga, I glanced out the window, saw that it had already started to sprinkle, and immediately my body said, ick, walking in cold rain, you know that you hate that, go to yoga and maybe grocery shop, but let’s not go for a long walk, you’ll be chilled and grossed out and will look like a drowned rat, and I decided it was right. So, instead of putting on my walking shoes and coat, I threw on a light rain jacket and boots. Imagine my surprise when I reached the street and discovered that it was not raining.
Clearly my windows need washing.
Then I went to yoga and the teacher said that the focus for February is compassion, starting with self-compassion, and repeated an analogy that her teacher had shared with her: the light within us shines out through our hearts like light through a window; but when we give in to negative emotions, it is as if that window is dirty and our light cannot shine through.
I took that as a sign that it was time to remake my narrative, change into my walking shoes, and go for that walk.
And to wash my windows.