Recently I read a LinkedIn post written by a recruiter, in the trending “my client said something so stupid and I schooled him” style. In this post, the recruiter’s client doubted a candidate’s loyalty because the candidate’s resume listed a series of jobs lasting 2 years or less.

At first, I thought I might enjoy the education that this recruiter delivered to this client.

Is 2 years a warning flag?

There’s nothing wrong with having a series of jobs that last 2 years or less – especially these days. 2 years is the new 5 years. I know a sharp project manager whose track record shows a series of jobs with under 2 years – she specializes in start-ups. Start-ups are risky: sometimes they work out, sometimes they don’t. That’s not a reflection of her worth or skills as a PM. And, with all the layoffs these days, it’s not unusual for people to work a series of short-term jobs.

Sometimes you have to move from company to company to get that promotion that you want. There’s a school of thought that would call a series of 2-year jobs “progressive management.” A friend was once told by a new manager that she shouldn’t stay in the job she loved because the longest you should stay in any job is 2 years because after that, you stop learning. The manager pushed my friend out of her job – and out of the company. (And then proceeded to take a promotion and stay in that job for almost 20 years. I guess that showed her.)

What the Recruiter Said

So I was curious to see what this recruiter would say to their client.

But instead of keying in on the 2-year aspect of the client’s concern, the recruiter keyed in on the word loyalty – and the way that they keyed in on it pushed every button I have.

To paraphrase the recruiter’s POV: loyalty is not about the length of time that you stay at a company. (True.) It’s about how much you’re willing to sacrifice for the company. (Huh?) It’s about, would this candidate put their job first, over personal needs, their family, their health, their mental health. That’s what you should be hiring for, the recruiter told their client, not length of time in previous jobs.

What?!?

Have the last few years taught us nothing about the employer-employee social contract? What happened to “family first”? What happened to “put your own mask on first so you can take care of others”? What happened to “recharge” / “set boundaries” / “don’t make it a habit to work 24/7”?

Let’s not call a candidate’s willingness to sacrifice their health, mental health, or family on behalf of a company, “Loyalty.”

What is Loyalty to a Company?

Loyalty to a company doesn’t mean that you give up your life for the organization, staying despite a lack of promotions and raises, physically or mentally dangerous or neglectful working conditions, or morally bankrupt or dishonest situations.

Loyalty to a company means that you don’t steal things, ideas, or people from the company.

It means that you show up when you’re supposed to, you work hard, you look for ways to make things better, instead of just complaining about how things are. And, yes, sometimes you work late or on weekends or through lunch. (But not, I contend, every day.)

Loyalty means that you don’t make decisions on behalf of the company that increase your selfish profits – financial or emotional – at a risk to the company. Such as laying off assistant managers to generate a short-term lift in the stock price so you can collect a fat bonus, although it means that the company will be unable to thrive in the longer term. Or laying off the people who protect children from predators on your social media platform because it makes you feel powerful to stick it to people you disagree with politically.

Loyalty means that you care for the organization’s well-being as if you owned the organization. You don’t run it down in public – and you don’t run down the quarterback that you selected, in public, even when they can’t read the field, miss obviously open receivers, and get sacked in the end zone. Instead, you quietly work to make them better. Or you trade them so they can go on to learn what it really means to be a quarterback and get the starting QB job in Seattle.

Loyalty also means that you take care of people who work for the organization. You look for ways to make it easier for them to do their jobs. If they are being bullied, you set boundaries on their behalf instead of saying, “Oh, but that person makes money.” Or “Oh, but we can’t get along without that genius, we need them.”

And it means that you don’t take a fat payout while employees get tiny raises. That you don’t bounce their paychecks or steal their retirement fund contributions, or cut off their health insurance with no notice – and blame your accountant. And it means that you don’t cancel retirement funds for elderly people who helped make your organization successful for many years.

When Does Loyalty Mean Sacrifice?

Let’s get this straight: the kind of loyalty where you sacrifice your physical or mental health – or your family – is reserved for people or for ideals, not for organizations.

When soldiers put their lives on the line in war, they aren’t fighting for a military organization (“the army”), they’re fighting for the principles of democracy or for the people in their unit, the people fighting next to them. They are fighting for their families and neighbors, for their right to exist as a sovereign nation, for the right to worship freely, for access to food and water. For freedom.

When firefighters run up the stairs instead of down, they aren’t being loyal to the NYFD, they’re being loyal to their teammates, and to people who need rescuing. When cops take a bullet, they aren’t being loyal to the NYPD, their loyalty is to the people in danger or to the idea of the rule of law. When teachers spend their own wages to buy school supplies for their students, they’re not doing that because they’re loyal to the Dept of Ed or their school, they’re doing it because they are loyal to the kids, and to the idea of education.

Loyalty is for People

When I was in college, I had a friend who went on the lam with her drug-dealer boyfriend. Totally off the grid (easier in those days). No one knew where they were. And he was abusive, too.

She told me later that, the few times she called home, seeking comfort from family or friends, they berated her for her decision to stay with him: she was stupid, they told her, she had thrown away her life for something worthless.

I was the only one, she said, that always seemed happy to hear from her, I wanted to know how she was doing, I cared that she was okay. Our conversations made her realize that she was worth something, that she could walk away from this guy, that she could turn her life around. That she had something to come home to.*

She called my behavior “loyalty” and I’m not going to fight her on that word, although I wouldn’t have used that word, myself. I called it, caring or friendship.

Get it Straight about Loyalty

So let’s not call working yourself into the ground for an organization loyalty. If you’re sacrificing your health or mental health or relationships because the company always comes first, that’s not loyalty.

That’s burnout.

And no organization has the right to expect that of you.

Let’s not demean the concept of Loyalty.

_{*P.S. Eventually my friend did come home, turn her life around, finish college, get a grad degree at a prestigious school, earn a law degree, fall in love, get married, have two wonderful kids, and is living happily. If your life sucks, remember my friend. No path is one way: people find their way out of horrible situations and create meaningful lives for themselves – and you can, too. I believe in you because I’ve seen it happen.}